Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny

Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny is filled with unintentional metaphors that perfectly illustrate the franchise's downfall
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Staring
Harrison Ford, Mads Mikkelsen, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Antonio Banderas, John Rhys-Davies
Director
James Mangold
Rating
PG-13
Genre
Action, Adventure
Release Date
June 30, 2023
Overall Score
Rating Overview
Plot/Story
25%
Visuals/Cinematography
66%
Performance
60%
Direction
42%
Non-Wokeness
50%
Rating Summary
Don't let our overall score fool you. With a meandering and pointless plot full of unlikable and uninteresting characters as well as a sad, lonely, and broken old man in the shape of Indiana Jones, The Dial of Destiny is the physical manifestation of everything wrong with modern cinema.

Do you remember when Indiana Jones movies were fun and full of colorful characters for whom to root and dastardly villains to jeer? Well, Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny has killed them. Welcome to Indiana Jones and The Problems with Modern Cinema.

Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny

Set in 1969, Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny follows the titular character on what will hopefully be his last adventure. In a completely unneeded prologue/flashback so overlong that you can probably still catch it, we are introduced to half of The Dial of Destiny, a device engineered by the legendary mathematician Archimedes. Its purported purpose is to pinpoint the location of rents in the spacetime continuum.

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Introduce Mads Mikkelsen’s Dr. Voller, the blandest and most generic Nazi villain in movie history. At the end of World War II, Voller was recruited by the U.S. Government to aid them in rocket technology. Now that he’s completed his task and man has walked on the moon, he’s turning his genius to his ultimate purpose, the recovery of The Dial of Destiny. Should he find both pieces of the ancient treasure, he plans to return to 1930s Nazi Germany, usurp Hitler, and use his advanced knowledge of rocket propulsion to win the war.

It’s actually an interesting premise that could have easily been the seed for even a mediocre action-adventure film. Yet, Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny is so boring that large groups (as in more than one group) of viewers left the theater I was in throughout its 2.5 hours. Except for actors who are far better than the material, some beautiful costume designs, and cinematography lovingly crafted to feel like this film’s vastly superior predecessors (The Crystal Skull notwithstanding), this dismal entry into the lore is a wretched mess.

While Indiana doesn’t survive a nuclear blast by hiding in a refrigerator this time around, a soulless digital simulacrum of a completely exposed and unprotected 40-year-old Indiana survives (completely unscathed) a nearly point-blank explosion from a conventional bomb the size of two men during the film’s never-ending prologue. This level of “not quite as bad as the last one” permeates The Dial of Destiny.

In lieu of the ridiculous vine-swinging army of monkeys and Indy Jr. from The Crystal Skull, this film has Indiana’s lifeless digitally de-aged avatar fighting on a computer-generated train, making the whole sequence feel like the Nazi Polar Express. Still, it’s not as bad as the last one. Instead of goofy-looking Shia LaBeouf‘s bad Fonzie impersonation, we get the talented Phoebe Waller Bridge’s bitter and unlikable Helena acting like a bitter and unlikable man. Still, it’s not as bad as the last one.

What is worse than the last one is Indiana Jones himself. Once the pinnacle of masculinity, a brave and daring man’s man whose zest for life was only matched by his brilliance, Henry Jones Jr. is now a broken, sad, and lonely old man with less energy in him than the PlayStation cutscene posing as Indiana from the previous scene. It’s clear that the filmmakers’ intention was for a lost and broken Indiana to recapture his spirit by the film’s end. However, its horrible pacing and meandering and underdeveloped plot, along with Harrison Ford’s miserably sad demeanor in nearly every scene, make for a deeply depressing movie with an empty and unearned resolution.

In a movie whose pedigree, both in front and behind the camera, is virtually unassailable, it’s inexcusable that this team of filmmakers couldn’t achieve greater heights. However, the film suffers on every level. Minor details, like shiny and polished cars that have just traveled dry and dusty dirt roads, inconsistency with ballast in a major set piece set underwater, and the fact that Mad Mikkelson’s character takes a metal pipe to the face at 60 mph (I can’t stress enough how violent this collision was – he should be a headless corpse rotting in the Alps) yet only has a scar on his forehead, serves to inch the viewer out of a fictional reality whose story is so boring and whose lead is so sad and depressing that the audience is already looking for any excuse to do so. Moreover, this lack of attention to detail perfectly underscores the disparity between care and love for the property that the makers of the first three clearly felt and this current crop.

Stuffed with dangling and unnecessary plot holes and suffering from poor and inconsistent pacing, a sad and depressing shell of a once loved and admired legend, a forgettable and generic villain, a plot that doesn’t begin to grip until the film’s end, and a resolution that resolves nothing, Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny is destined to rot at the bottom of the DVD bargain bin for the rest of eternity.

WOKE ELEMENTS

UPDATE: Upon reflection, I’ve had a change of heart. Considering that the entire film is Indiana being a broken-down shell of a once great legacy character who has to be saved by the perfect younger chick, I’ve bumped the film to woke

  • While Phoebe Waller-Bridge’s charismatic performance couldn’t save Helena from being an off-putting stereotypical “strong independent woman (i.e. woman written as a snarky cartoon man),” she does about as much with the character as anyone could. At least Helena isn’t shown as being able to manhandle 200 lbs men in their prime.
  • There are several woke one-liners hamfistedly peppered throughout the movie.
    • “You trigger happy cracker” is uttered without any self-awareness.
      • Just because white people think it’s dumb and aren’t bothered by it doesn’t make it any less a racial slur. The hypocrisy is what’s offensive.
    • “You stole it. He stole it. I stole it. It’s called capitalism.”
    • “[I’m] daring, beautiful, and self-sufficient” is uttered by Helena as a snarky reminder that she’s a strong independent woman, just in case you forgot.
    • Indiana Jones has witnessed the wrath and healing powers of God first-hand. Yet in this movie, he utters the meaningless Leftist platitude, “It’s not what you believe but how hard you believe.”
  • The CIA and U.S. Government are evil and willing to let innocent Americans be murdered in order to let their pet Nazi rocket scientist pursue what they believe to be a hobby.
  • Helena scoffs at the idea of being rescued by a man.
  • Helena knocks out the legendary (but now hysterical) Indiana Jones with one punch!
    • Oh, and she punches like a girl.

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James Carrick

James Carrick is a passionate film enthusiast with a degree in theater and philosophy. James approaches dramatic criticism from a philosophic foundation grounded in aesthetics and ethics, offering insight and analysis that reveals layers of cinematic narrative with a touch of irreverence and a dash of snark.

61 comments

  • Norm Sturm

    June 30, 2023 at 2:50 pm

    I’m not a movie critic…just an average Joe. My wife and I (as well as an elderly neighbor we brought to the show with us) simply loved the movie. Lots of action and it kept our interest. Great to see several of the original case too. Sorry to disagree…but two thumbs up from me.

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    • James Carrick

      June 30, 2023 at 3:04 pm

      I’m glad that you enjoyed it. Only the Left believes that everyone has to think the same thing.

      This is exactly why we keep the comments section open.

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  • Martha F

    July 1, 2023 at 8:50 am

    As a latina , I was appalled to hear the black CIA agent call her teammate a Cracker . The use of tropes by Disney is the reason they are doomed to fail. The movie was a dull rehash of previous movies and I was unmoved by the nostalgia. If I had paid actual money to see this Id want it back.

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  • Tia

    July 1, 2023 at 11:15 pm

    Why is Disney determined that heroes of yester-year should now be sad, broken old men who need young, perfect women to replace them? They did this with Luke Skywalker (seriously, his character was such a disappointment in that movie) and now it seems they’ve done it to Indiana Jones. I don’t want my heroes to become sad, bitter and unheroic, I want them to shine, even to the end!

    Sigh. Anyway, thanks for the review! This is another movie worth skipping.

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  • Peter

    July 2, 2023 at 1:01 am

    You forgot the classic ‘where are you from’ exchange with the hotel Porter. Woke 101.

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    • James Carrick

      July 2, 2023 at 9:11 am

      I remember. It’s just that an actual Nazi saying racist things doesn’t seem woke to me. But, that’s why the comments section is available.

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  • Cristian

    July 3, 2023 at 2:08 am

    Cracker lol

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  • EG Arnold

    July 3, 2023 at 3:05 am

    Great review, thanks for saving me the time and money!

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  • Linda Neave

    July 3, 2023 at 5:54 am

    Great review ! this is just what I have been looking for. Not watching these ghastly Woke films will save me time and money. Thank you 🇬🇧

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  • Taj

    July 3, 2023 at 6:47 am

    Thank you for the review. I loved your closing line: ” . . . Indiana Jones and The Dial of Destiny is destined to rot at the bottom of the DVD bargain bin for the rest of eternity.” 🤣 brothers and I loved Indiana Jones growing up, and now my kids — along with my nieces and nephews — do as well. We were looking forward to this movie. I’m not surprised, just disappointed. *sigh*

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  • Herb

    July 3, 2023 at 10:31 am

    Agree . A thin plot with endless special effects that continue far too long.

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  • Robinsong

    July 3, 2023 at 12:29 pm

    It had its flaws but it was better than I expected, and I’m usually not a fan of action flicks nor the Indiana Jones franchise. The only things I found grating were that cracker line and an Angela Davis-looking character in charge of a team of white henchmen. If you can suspend disbelief and run with the occasional absurdity, it can be a genuinely satisfying popcorn movie.

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  • Alina

    July 3, 2023 at 1:40 pm

    I’m not a critic but from reading what was written I can easily ‘see’ that this iteration of the Indiana Jones movies is a huge disappointment. But to be honest, I would have guessed that without reading the review. Any movie made today in the current left woke environment will more than likely have the same problems.
    The woke leftist are not creative methodical thinkers, they do everything half ass and don’t pay attention to the details. Our government is a perfect example: they create problems and don’t know how to fix them, so they blame someone else for the problems. They can comprehend the idea of thinking things through to discover problems that might occur and resolutions to correct them. T
    This is what we get for allowing younger generations to express themselves and do what they want without respect for anyone else and consequences for their actions.

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  • Gerry

    July 3, 2023 at 1:51 pm

    I once said that I would be thrilled to go see “Indiana Jones 26”. Then came “The Crystal Skull” and I started to lose my enthusiasm. Now this. Will Disney ever realize that part of Harrison Ford’s charm is his comedy? Without Indiana Jones’ comedy and Han Solo’s comedy, two great franchises are nearly dead.

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  • Michael Summers

    July 3, 2023 at 2:05 pm

    I’d say your “Woke’ score is too high. Maybe 20 to 25 is better for the bitch fest you had on this film. I found it fun and a good send off for our aged, but beloved hero. You did hit a good point about the guy’s head not being knocked off after being hit by the pipe. But hey, in action films like this one, you have to suspend some belief!

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    • James

      July 7, 2023 at 1:06 am

      Oh, you “had fun” watching this movie? Well I guess that counters every criticism in this review then. Where would we be without your brilliant insight?

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      • Robby

        July 9, 2023 at 4:03 am

        It’s his opinion, calm down a little

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        • The.judging.crow

          July 11, 2023 at 6:38 am

          Disney could have easily had Indy with a happy family and mutt. He gets called into action to save a now grown up short round and together they fight Nazis, save the day and give indy the perfect finale.

          Instead this came. This movie deserves to fail.

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  • Lidija

    July 3, 2023 at 2:56 pm

    I enjoyed the movie. Of course, it’s nothing close to 1 & 3, but I thought it was fun, and I appreciated the various “nods” to the past movies. I thought the ending scene was a great way to wrap it all up. (So sweet, almost made me cry.) I also thought the woke rating was too high. I almost didn’t go see it, but I’m glad I did. Having low expectations probably helped, but it was still a fun flick.

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  • Michael Summers

    July 3, 2023 at 9:50 pm

    Those who complain about the “Cracker” line seem to forget that that was how people talked back then. Get over it. It’s not woke to use the line. It’s a fact that it was used! I am not surprised the N word wasn’t included though. That is woke-ism because, to me, you don’t want to offend some one because of race. Oh wait! It was okay to say Cracker! Never mind. One sided woke-ism strikes again. Do you expect to tell a period story and not use the language of the times? Get real.

    And so what if the female lead of the film was an independent woman. I can’t believe I’m saying all this because I hate woke-ism. But back in the 60’s women were really starting to show their worth and this film doesn’t hide it.

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    • Jeremiah

      July 7, 2023 at 3:31 pm

      A woman’s worth is not in her pants or in her snark. It’s in her ability to care for others, in her nurture and in her grace. This woman, as she’s been described, sounds about as worthless as a woman could be.

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      • Xena

        July 19, 2023 at 3:40 pm

        Women are worth more than their maternal drive, especially in the context of a movie! PWB’s character isn’t worthless because she’s not nuturing and graceful, her character is worthless because she’s an irredeemable ass whose only role in the film was to upstage and replace Jones without a shred of charisma or effort.

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    • Mulga Bill

      November 4, 2023 at 12:31 pm

      Happy to be proved wrong, but I suspect the use ‘cracker’ is quite anachronistic.

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    • i hate disney

      December 4, 2023 at 6:59 pm

      People also said the n-word back then, but you’ll never see that in a Disney film.

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  • James

    July 4, 2023 at 11:51 am

    It would’ve been nice to see an elderly Jones still sharp and engaging. They could have done that, but apparently they decided to make him appear as a doddering old man. Too bad.

    I’ll pass on this. No money for Disney from my wallet.

    And regarding the “cracker” comment…It’s clearly a racist comment. Racism is racism. It shouldn’t be tolerated no matter to whom it is aimed. Once again, shame on Disney.

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  • Teresa Fahy

    July 6, 2023 at 6:19 am

    I saw the movie last night and really enjoyed it! I’ve been a fan of Indiana Jones since Raiders of the Lost Arc in 1981 and it was good to see him back on our screens. I accepted the old man bit, as that is exactly the age he would be now. It was really the only part of the film where I didn’t have to suspend disbelief, but then that is what Indiana Jone’s movies are all about. An escape into a world of unrealistic excitement where the unbelievable happens & funny lines are randomly thrown. I found the scene where Helena rode her motorbike fast enough to grab onto the undercarriage of the plane, just as it left the ground, so ridiculous and unbelievable that it was funny! Just like James Bond, it’s the ridiculousness of it all that makes it fun. Going back 2000 and meeting Archimede’s, another unbelievable moment. I was looking out for woke messages and didn’t find too many too that was turned off. The only comment that actually did surprise me as being very ‘un-woke’ was when Indiana said to the Nazi “you’re German, you’re not funny”. I mentioned to my husband on leaving the film that I was surprised they allowed that line to be included in the current wokeish world we are living . Indiana Jones movies are not meant to be taken seriously. I would have given it a 25% rating on wokeness. But for couple of hours of easy escapism with the chance to reminisce about the fit, young, good-looking Adonis that Indiana was in his prime when he did deliver some of the best ‘un-woke’ sexist remarks to Kathleen Turner it was worth the entry fee. Just to hear the theme tune played out again (which has always been my favourite part) – it was worth it! Thanks for your website, as an eager movie goer, it will be great.

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  • Kate

    July 6, 2023 at 11:36 pm

    After movie I was disappointed. Not the send off it deserved. By the next day after more thought I was angry. How does that bad a script get approved? Way too long with unnecessary side stories. CIA didnt move the story along. Dive scene painfully silly. Transition from kid and lady hating Indy to saving him had no logic. In conclusion, final script felt like first draft they forgot to edit, and edit, and edit some more. Who’s fault is that???

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    • James Carrick

      July 6, 2023 at 11:43 pm

      My understanding is that it went through numerous rewrites. It was a patchwork mess of narrative and sadness.

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  • Retro Hound

    July 7, 2023 at 8:46 pm

    James,

    First, I want to thank you for this site. It’s a sad state of affairs when we need to address the woke factor of entertainment, but in this current climate highly necessary! I haven’t seen Indy 5 and have no plans to, knowing that it comes from the corrupt empty soul of Disney. It’s corporate filmmaking with an agenda (you name, it’s in there), not creativity flowing like water to “wow” us fans. Aside from everything that’s been mentioned about this film, it’s painfully obvious the writers made this Indy so out of character. Age doesn’t matter, they could have worked around it no problemo. The scene in the cave when he and Helena have critters on them and he’s begging her to get them off him… Come on! Compare that to Raiders when Indy and Satipo were in the cave. It’s obvious Kathleen Kennedy’s agenda is to emasculate every legacy character and elevate her hand-picked brunettes with British accents. Man alive, and they say the male ego is big…

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  • Carl

    July 9, 2023 at 2:55 pm

    The main wokeness I see is that the villains of the previous movies were socialists and communists. In Dial the enemy becomes us. This is like a bad leftist 60s wet dream.

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    • Jedediah Merle

      July 26, 2023 at 6:43 pm

      What are you talking about? Only the bad guys in crystal skull were socialist (Soviets). In 2 they were Indian cultists, in 1 and 3 they were fascist Nazis like in 5. Spielberg is a leftist and all his movies are ‘revenge’ against the Right because of the nazis (see also schindlers list)

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      • Manolo

        September 4, 2023 at 12:33 am

        Nazi is short for National Socialist German Workers Party. They were just right wing socialists.

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        • Hiram

          April 14, 2024 at 6:04 am

          And North Korea is officially called the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea… I think people in the US should really stop using terms that they don’t understand. You and your ignorant MSM simply ruined terms such as: fascist, socialist, communist, democratic and freedom.

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    • Emily

      August 9, 2023 at 1:43 pm

      ‘the enemy becomes us’ – dude, are you identifying with Nazis? You might be saying the quiet part out loud…

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      • Manolo

        September 4, 2023 at 12:38 am

        The negative remarks about capitalism I believe. The reviewer also said something about the US government being painted in a bad light.Thanls for the trolling anyway.

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  • Jeff

    July 9, 2023 at 9:14 pm

    I actually liked it, yeah the cracker thing felt unnecessary, as did the whole CIA element in my opinion, but while it wasn’t as good as the original trilogy (obviously), it delivered on the action & what I would have expected from an Indians Jones movie when Indy is 80 🤣.

    Fun plot, could have things kept you guessing, all in all probably 7-8/10 in my book.

    Probably time for a reboot “further adventures” style from the comics!

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  • Sam

    July 12, 2023 at 10:06 pm

    Best movie review I’ve seen in a long time. Kudos sir!

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  • Steve

    July 13, 2023 at 3:20 am

    ‘Phoebe Waller-Bridge’, ‘engaging’ and ‘talented’ are words that do not belong in the same sentence, unless separated by the words ‘is not’. Kathleen Kennedy and her relentless quest to destroy our legacy male action heroes, together with her ridiculous self insert Mary Sue characters that belittle them, should be unemployed by now….

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  • Yvonne

    July 16, 2023 at 9:53 am

    Except, “The CIA and U.S. Government are evil and willing to let innocent Americans be murdered in order to (fill in the blank).” This part is actually spot on.

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  • Isaac

    July 20, 2023 at 4:06 pm

    Wasn’t horrible in my opinion, yes the girl was very annoying and snarky a lot of the time, but her knocking a gunshot wounded 70 year old indy out with one punch wasn’t too unrealistic. I thought the opening sequence was the best part of the film, felt like a classic Indiana Jones adventure once you got past the cgi of his face. Just seeing him running around and watching Nazis getting punched is always entertaining.

    Indiana Jones film rankings for me would have to be:
    1: Raiders of the Ark
    2: The Last Crusade
    3: Temple of Doom
    4: Dial of Destiny
    5: Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

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    • Letsgo Brandon

      July 26, 2023 at 6:12 pm

      ‘Nazi punching’ is fun? Are you an woke antifa leftist? Because you sound like one.

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      • joe

        July 29, 2023 at 2:14 am

        what does that even mean

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        • Letsgo Brandon

          July 29, 2023 at 7:57 am

          It means that the German ‘bad guys’ in this movie are unfairly representative as evil when really they were the first anti wokes and they tried to save us from ((them)) and the woke transgender ideology. Now they are mocked and lies spread by Hollywood.

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        • James Carrick

          July 29, 2023 at 10:10 am

          LetsgoBrandon is a troll. He regularly posts thinly veiled pro-Nazi garbage in the comments in an effort to make our site look pro-Nazi or Nazi-friendly.

          The woke Left routinely equates conservatives with Nazis, and they lack the intellectual capacity or honesty to call out actual racism. So, when some of us rail against diversity hiring in lieu of meritorious hiring, dimwits like LetsgoBrandon pounce.

          No one involved with our site believes that one race is superior to another. Furthermore, we believe that diversity hiring practices are harmful to the industry as well as to people of color. It unfairly paints all but the most brilliant actors of color with a stigma of doubt as to their qualifications, while simultaneously being anti-white racism (which is just racism).

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  • Arlene P.

    July 26, 2023 at 10:31 pm

    I’m bored in the movie, nearly empty theater, wondering if anyone else thinks this movie is boring and the characters unlikable. Thank you for your review.

    They should’ve made the movie about St. Longius’ spear or I should’ve just seen ‘Sound of Freedom’ again. Now THAT was a worthwhile movie.

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  • Al

    July 30, 2023 at 2:52 am

    Yeah Nazis facists aka socialists.

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    • James Carrick

      July 30, 2023 at 2:52 pm

      Nazi is short for Nationalsozialist (National Socialists)

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      • Grant Naylor

        August 7, 2023 at 8:56 am

        Sorry to but in, but this is a common misconception. The Nazis called themselves ‘socialist’ in order to court favour away from left-wing worker’s groups; in reality, they were fiercely antisocialist and even sent the ‘Bolshevics’ to death camps.
        Hitler even explains this in Mein Kampf: “Socialism is the science of dealing with the common weal. Communism is not Socialism. Marxism is not Socialism. The Marxians have stolen the term and confused its meaning. I shall take Socialism away from the Socialists.”
        This isn’t to say that they weren’t bad; they were obviously a force of evil just like the Soviets they opposed. However I believe in being historically accurate, and we should all be opposing the far-right as well as the far-left, they are just as bad as each other. If we want liberals to take us seriously and stop equating us with Nazis, maybe we should start denouncing and calling out the Nazi beliefs that are a stain on our right-wing spaces.

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        • Manolo

          September 4, 2023 at 12:51 am

          He stated that Marxism isn’t socialism. Seems like the meaning was that Hitler was a true socialist and wanted to take the term back from the Bolsheviks.

          Also, how is saying, “Nazi stood for ‘National Socialist,'” identifying as a Nazi? That seems like Leftist logic.

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  • Forrest

    August 4, 2023 at 1:33 am

    Excellent review and informative details. My view is simple – we’re in an economic crisis of epic proportion. People are living in their cars, keep in mind, these are productive people working full time jobs yet in horrible poverty. The last thing anyone wants to do is pay money for a ticket (average $12-15 per seat) for a film that is filled with politics.
    It’s a slap in the face from our wonderful billionaire in Hollywood. People are sick of it!

    In the end that’s what it came too.
    Traditionally, entertainment was for ordinary people to pull themselves out of reality for a couple hours.
    These new films are all about selling their views (better yet, stuffing it down people’s throat)
    There so many reviews of how woke was not the problem with that film and anyone who thinks that way are racist

    Guess what – the only way us saps can stand up is simply saying – you love your agenda?
    Well stuff your mouth with it and enjoy your ###### because we’re not paying for it anymore.
    Once the billionaires feel the loss (on a global scale) films will begin to change.

    This strategy is not sustainable.

    Plus the pandemic has changed people’s habits of viewing films – nowadays these crappy films are on streaming platforms quick.

    Lastly – with technology – people are able to get the theater experience at home with new Digital and even 3-D viewing technology.

    So whether your right or left- if political views are injected into a film – they will fail Everytime

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  • Uncle Jack

    August 8, 2023 at 3:09 pm

    5 out of 5

    Gotta admit, I laughed at loud, at work, to “Nazi Polar Express.” I’m not sure why. it’s not THAT funny. It just struck me at this particular time hilariously.

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  • Robert B. Barker

    September 3, 2023 at 3:13 am

    5 out of 5

    It’s about as woke as you can get:

    Phoebe Waller-Bridge is an obvious transgender. In the movie, his character knows more than Indiana Jones about Archimedes and the Mechanism. Indiana Jones, trained as an agent, survived countless encounters and this (transgender) hero knows more… yeah, believable. Also, the character knows enough combat skills to keep up with elite trained warriors. It’s a shortcoming of Hollywood, I get it; however, it’s still a massive logical hole: untrained, but some how, naturally gifted characters are better than trained elite people.

    We have a black womyn to save the entire group. She even uses the epithet “cracker” to get her point across. She represents, and exhibits, every single woke trope: black, womyn, more intelligent than the “crackers”, more skilled and more empathetic.

    (((Harrison Ford))) is better than the entire German army. According to the opening, as played by Mr. Ford, Indiana Jones could have single-handedly defeated elite German army. Good thing we have Him.

    I used to LOVE the Indiana Jones series. It changed my life. I studied Archaeology/Anthropology in college due to my love for Indiana Jones. I actually spoke with Harrison Ford on several occasions and found him to be pleasant and personable. Yet, I see tripe like this and think that he’s being used to push an agenda.

    My girlfriend and I are so bored by this movie that she just went to bed, at 1:10:36 into the movie and I’m writing this review. It’s trash and another beloved franchise completely ruined by modern insensibilities.

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  • Madame Katherine

    September 3, 2023 at 6:39 pm

    5 out of 5

    I was so overwhelmed by how terrible the film was I missed any specific “woke” elements. The CGI of Indy was seriously weird! Why do that!!? Weird Polar Express vibes! It seemed to me he wanted it so he could show off how gorgeous he was when he was younger? was it even necessary?
    Phoebe Waller Bridge in the UK is regarded as a cool character but in this film she has lost so much credibility being associated with such a dreadful film. Bad acting, bad delivery of dull lines.
    I cant believe I saw it through to the end, my daughter and I thought when they were in the place with the sliding water trickery the film could have been saved but we’d almost given up by then, the whole thing seemed overly long. Can’t put my finger on it, just v dull.

    Reply

  • Manolo

    September 4, 2023 at 8:08 am

    5 out of 5

    “Due to a reported lack of wide appeal for moviegoers and an expensive overall budget, the film was deemed a box office bomb, and resulted in a $100 million loss for Disney.”

    – Wikipedia

    Reply

  • Tony P

    September 7, 2023 at 3:13 pm

    5 out of 5

    I enjoyed your review, but none of the ‘woke’ elements sound woke – they aren’t unhinged enough. It does, however, sound like a terrible film anyway.

    Reply

  • Mulga Bill

    November 4, 2023 at 12:44 pm

    5 out of 5

    You Americans sometimes share our Australian cultural cringe when it comes to the UK.
    The correct appraisal of the lead actress should be: “Phoebe Waller-Bridge, is there no beginning to her talents?”.
    Woke snark is her sole setting. Refer to the dismal “Fleabag” for more of her ordure.

    Reply

    • James Carrick

      November 4, 2023 at 2:12 pm

      I’ll admit that, the only thing I’d seen her in before this was Solo, which I mostly slept through while on an airplane.

      As such, I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt to the actress and assumed that the problem with her character rested solely on the shoulders of the writers and director.

      Since then, I’ve seen more and, in retrospect, I’d have written something other than what I did.

      Reply

  • Dope man

    December 31, 2023 at 3:19 am

    I slogged through it, bored and resorted to cracking jokes about all the plotholes with my friends. Still impressed everyone always knew the exact location to show up to at the exact right time with no gps trackers or cell phones. But, it was better than what they did to Star Wars.

    Reply

  • Hiram

    April 14, 2024 at 6:12 am

    People say racism is racism and every case should be treated equal … and yet I see all of you referring towards one racial slur as “the N-word” but freely typing “cracker” without any censorship.

    Why?

    Why not “the C-word”?

    Double standards.

    Reply

  • sound of Text

    April 21, 2024 at 6:54 am

    I completely agree with your review! I laughed out loud at the scene with the mansion’s wall collapsing. It was so over-the-top and cheesy, but in the best possible way. And the dial of destiny itself was an excellent nod to the classic adventure films of the past. I’m glad to see that Indiana Jones is still delivering in this latest installment!

    Reply

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