- Starring
- Emma Stone, Mark Ruffalo, Willem Dafoe
- Director
- Yorgos Lanthimos
- Rated
- R (should be X)
- Genre
- Romance, Sci-Fi
- Release date
- December 8, 2023
Overall Score
Rating Overview
Rating Summary
Mary Shelley, the author of Frankenstein, penned her iconic novel in 1816 during a summer stay at Lord Byron’s villa on Lake Geneva. The creation of this Gothic masterpiece was sparked by a friendly competition among Byron, Percy Bysshe Shelley (Mary’s husband), John Polidori, and herself, to craft the most chilling ghost story. The haunting tale of Victor Frankenstein and his reanimated creature emerged from this literary challenge, showcasing Mary Shelley’s imaginative prowess and giving birth to one of the most enduring works of horror literature.
Poor Things
Set in a fictional steampunk 1800s Europe, when mad scientist Dr. Godwin Baxter (Willem Dafoe) finds a fresh and viable corpse floating in the river, he’s compelled to experiment on it, ultimately bringing it back to life as the seemingly dimwitted Bella (Emma Stone). As the abomination Bella matures, she begins a journey of self-discovery that will lead to her full actualization.
Billed as a dark comedy, Poor Things is a reimagining of the Gothic Horror classic Frankenstein, but unlike most reimaginings, which usually only end up being inferior to their source material, Poor Things is a dumpster fire of vileness, infantile philosophy, and arrogance that can be seen from space.
Willem Dafoe gives his usual 110% as the quirky doctor, but for all of the impressive prosthetics he wears, his character isn’t much to look at. Despite how the commercials may make it appear, Dafoe is a tertiary character with very little development or screen time. Instead, his primary use is that of a plot catalyst and not much else.
Mark Ruffalo plays Duncan Wedderburn, a lawyer and self-proclaimed cad who is immediately besotted with Bella. Mind you, she has the mind of a toddler. His first interaction with her is to molest her, which she enjoys… because she has the mind of a toddler and the sex drive of an adult. Disgusted yet?
One of the film’s few redeeming qualities is Ruffalo’s exaggerated performance. Regrettably, his character engages in a disturbing and graphic sexual relationship with a severely mentally handicapped woman, portraying a torrid and explicit love affair throughout their European tour. This ugliness lays waste to any potential comedy beats that his performance might otherwise provide.
While the film has much and more wrong with it, one of its most significant weaknesses is everything about its main character. Completely ignoring Tropic Thunder’s sage advice, Emma Stone’s natural comedic panache renders Bella’s mental capacity as an 80s/90s middle school joke instead of the nuanced character those involved in the film’s creation mistakenly believe it to be.
Furthermore, Bella’s childlike mentality elevates the film’s relentless pornography from merely graphic and gratuitous to utterly grotesque. That Bella’s evolution is only ever propelled forward by graduated sexual perversions culminating in her getting run through as a French whore (WITH THE MIND OF A CHILD) is a disturbing commentary on the filmmakers’ worldview.
Making things worse, Poor Things is a plodding two-and-a-half hours with a meandering plot. While it repeatedly tells us about fun adventures that Bella gets into, it chooses to show us scene after scene of her walking around in between said adventures. This gives the audience plenty of time to ponder the horror show that must have been writer/director Yorgos Lanthimos’s childhood. We wouldn’t be surprised if he’s not allowed within 500 yards of a school.
Ultimately, Poor Things is a never-ending pedo-fetish porno with fantastic cinematography and a beautiful aesthetic that has absolutely no idea what it takes to make a well-paced and focused film, let alone what it means to be human.
WOKE ELEMENTS
Let’s talk about sex.
- The entirety of the film hinges on and furiously preaches the wrong-think that juvenile hedonism is the meaning of life.
- Bella’s character finds love in a lesbian relationship because.
- The film is full of discordant music throughout. The only exception is in this scene.
- In one particularly graphic scene, moments after we discover that Bella ***SPOILER*** is an actual child in an adult’s body, ***END SPOILER*** the “comedy” offers one of its many attempts at humor and shows us Bella loudly orgasm after ramming an apple inside of herself.
- In another “comedic” scene, a man brings his young sons (approximately 10 and 12 years old) to Bella so that he can have instructive sex in front of them. He then plans for them to have sex with her.
- It is overtly expressed that being a whore is how a woman finds her freedom.
- There’s a lot (like someone had a very friendly drunk uncle – “a lot”) of genital “gags,” play, and talk – if a fraction of a second of it was remotely related to funny, at least it could be written off as ineffective attempts at humor, but this isn’t funny and is really uncomfortably odd.
- Bella’s character finds love in a lesbian relationship because.
The talking points are strong with this one.
- There’s a line about not accepting the lie of religion, capitalism, or socialism, blah blah blah
Sacrilege
- There’s some nonsense about the stifling wrongness of a Christian nation.
- Dafoe’s character was given the last name Godwin solely so that Bella would have an excuse to refer to him as God.
Men are overrated
- Every man is a mess in one way or another, and the only two people who find any true happiness are Bella (once she begins studying for a career in medicine) and her lesbian lover.
James Carrick
James Carrick is a passionate film enthusiast with a degree in theater and philosophy. James approaches dramatic criticism from a philosophic foundation grounded in aesthetics and ethics, offering insight and analysis that reveals layers of cinematic narrative with a touch of irreverence and a dash of snark.
38 comments
Kevin
December 7, 2023 at 5:46 pm
Man you really pulled no punches with this one. I am s sorry you had to put yourself through that dumpster fire of a movie.
Jack
February 6, 2024 at 6:40 pm
Lol I feel the same way. Maybe they drink a lot after making the review to wipe their memories of the horrific experience?
Jolene
December 7, 2023 at 10:51 pm
How the heck did this one get greenlighted?!?
Their fairytale ending is that she gets away from the evil men and is with a lesbian? What a terrible idea to present to young women!
Henry
December 12, 2023 at 8:35 pm
Never heard of this movie until now, but I just watched the trailer and it looks awful. I didn’t think it was possible, but this movie somehow looks both pretentious and low-brow at the same time. Mark Ruffalo trying to imitate Marlon Brando with that “Bella!” line was cringeworthy. Ruffalo is one of the most bland actors out there, and I was saying that long before I knew what his politics were.
Ethan
December 17, 2023 at 10:12 pm
Gotta say i can’t agree with you on this one. I found this to be one of the most straightforward and least woke films of the decade. This film provides darkly offensive humor that satirizes anyone and anything, along with pushing the r-rating too make sensitive sallys quiver in their seats. Reminded me of the best aspects of 70s films such as a clockwork orange, the devils, and barry lyndon. Yorgos has a genuine vision for what he wants to achive in his films, without pandering to a specifc political side. This man makes movies for audiences who are tired of the same safe, derivative and stale movies that plague our society
James Savile
December 18, 2023 at 8:55 am
I dont know what you expect from European movies, their movies promote feminism lesbianism and communism in almost every movie. In Europe instead of church they have woke. What a shame that the great western civilization has fallen and been replaced with hack foreign communist film directors like ‘Yorgos’ which sounds muslim to me…
B
December 25, 2023 at 11:21 pm
Yeah,check the numbers,,-& PEOPLE ARE WALKING OUT OF THE “film”-in droves,,;) NEVER SAY DIE!!!!!!🇺🇸⚔️🇺🇸
F#ck religion
December 28, 2023 at 7:11 am
I don’t consider myself woke, but religion and the church are basically the cause of most f#cked up things that are happening in this world. In Europe we don’t have “woke instead of church” – we just don’t need a church to know right from wrong and also don’t need pedophiles preaching to us! Furthermore, no other country is as woke and at the same time divided as the USA! Just look at what’s going on on the Westcoast! It’s either ridiculously liberal socialist woke morons OR conservative religious republican idiots in the US! Think about that before talking bullsh#t about Europe! And what’s wrong with lesbianism? Women at least don’t account for 95% of crimes committed on this planet! Oh right, it’s your church that promotes this homophobic crap. And btw, Yorgos is a very typically Greek name and has nothing to do with “Muslim” – go educate yourself!
Bob
February 3, 2024 at 8:05 am
Homosexuality should never be promoted. It is unnatural and wrong.
Bob’s boyfriend
March 2, 2024 at 4:26 pm
Bob, clear your browser history.
Goromajima
March 15, 2024 at 11:46 am
Are you genuinely insane?
Don
December 21, 2023 at 10:17 pm
Hey, can we have a like feature for the review itself? Saved my tomorrow afternoon by reading this, thank you
Paul
December 23, 2023 at 12:23 pm
On a whim, I saw this yesterday. My wife said it was a retelling of Frankenstein and I watched lart of the trailer. We both thought it sucked. I kept looking at the time trying to see when it would end. Pretty sure I’ve never looked at the time while watching movie that many times before. Only redeeming quality was the unique look of the film.
Jojo
March 23, 2024 at 1:51 am
I had this film recommended by an acquaintance. I didn’t finish it. It lost me when she “discovered “ her sexuality by sticking an apple up her twat. Dude, that’s not how women masturbate ffs.
Regent
January 11, 2024 at 10:57 pm
This film is a visual masterpiece and I loved the discordant soundtrack. I had no problem with the sex scenes etc. It’s actually very close to the erotic art horror films of the 70’s Jean Rollin, Jess Franco etc . It’s not woke in the modern s sense but makes me think more of Emmanuel, Lady Chatterly. Yes I was annoyed by the feminist subtext and the ending, but I think the implications was that feminism is the Frankenstein Monster that was created.
Regent
January 18, 2024 at 12:02 pm
And just to be clear, I also despise Wokeness.
I just don’t think this movie was as bad as the review made it out to be in fact it’s quite anti- PC.
James Carrick
January 18, 2024 at 12:46 pm
It would be a very boring world if we all agreed all of the time.
Taylor
March 9, 2024 at 6:59 am
It’s Greek for George…
Regent
January 18, 2024 at 6:18 pm
Yep! And I also really enjoyed Godzilla minus 1 and agree with your review of that!
Bilbo
January 23, 2024 at 4:19 pm
This movie is just a pedo movie. She has the body of a woman, and the actual brain removed from a baby and put it into hers. She walks like a toddler and talks that way. Then they just start having naked men bang her over and over again. I saw someone say the was a beautiful feminist coming of age story. When did Feminism become pedophia. It has scenes filmed with a fish eye lense and what looks to be ring camera. This is not art. It is pure trash
Nowoke1
March 8, 2024 at 10:45 pm
I watched it today and halfway through I googled to see if anyone else got a pedophilia, human trafficking vibe or if it was just me. I’m glad others see right through it. This another example of Hollywood making depravity of pedophilia and being trafficked come across as if victims somehow are turned on by their horrific situations and it’s a choice.
Mark
January 29, 2024 at 3:57 am
I saw this in Italy dubbed and without subtitles. I know Italian well enough to have understood the convoluted script. The Italian audience didn’t seem too entertained either. If you compare movie going to a day at the amusement park, this film, Povera Creatures in Italian, was like riding a roller coaster that gets stuck going up the first decent. If I had seen this film in English I would’ve walked out during the intermission.
Ale
February 2, 2024 at 6:32 pm
lol, you know right that in China women are like the 33-34% of total people in prisons? and that if in the West they are much lesser than men, is due to the fact that…you all are privileged? socio-legally privileged? you literally have 8-9 times lesser chances to get arrested for the same crime as us men, and get 3/4 lesser sentences for the same crime. there are models, laws and feminist diktat like the Istanbul Convention, the Duluth Model and many others who PREVENT POLICE FROM ARRESTING YOU FOR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE in the US and many european countries. you kill 90% of babies too, how’s that? the most horrible crime in the world, killing babies, is made mostly by YOU females.
Geoff Webber
February 13, 2024 at 10:07 pm
Ok, I’m going to call it. This movie is ACTUALLY about how all promiscuous women were actually abused by a man when they were far too young – as per in this story. Therefore, they are broken and have fetishized the very act that broke them. That is true in real life but many people unaffected are unaware. This film is about infant sexual abuse and how, in this case, female ‘degeneracy’ is actually caused by that and, ultimately can only be truly healed by another woman. However… it’s hard not to think that this film isn’t aware of this, and that it, infact, is designed to appeal to MAPs and city girls. God help us all.
DM
February 19, 2024 at 9:36 am
I agree with every word and conclusion of this review. After seeing Poor Things, I felt crazy reading all the five star reviews of it. It was nothing but pretentious garbage, and I wish I had those 2.5 hours back so I could do something productive with them, like stare at a wall or pick my nose.
Bruce Guthrie
March 9, 2024 at 12:33 am
Just watched the movie. Good review. The movie appears to me to be an attempt to normalize pedophilia. Sex should be one of the most beautiful and sublime things in human experience. But this movie turns sex in to a depraved abomination. This movie appears to be an attempt to destroy all that is good in human beings. And yet 99% of the reviews are glowing, and academy awards may be in the offing. How can we warm the world about this?
Jennifer
March 11, 2024 at 11:49 pm
Disgusting from start to end. It was not just a girl with the mind of a child who was being glorified as a wanted sex object, as that is not bad enough (and illegal because someone that devoid of self awareness cannot make informed consent) but the brain of an actual child!! What 2 year old can be exposed to philosophy and sex and suddenly mature into a woman!? You cannot force the brain development, and it was an infants brain. As illustrated by her spitting out her food, indulging until vomiting, her choice of clothes and her awkward walking. The inconsistencies only make sense because it is what it is, grooming pedophilia Frankenstein meets Lolita garbage and pedowood just loves that crap! Which is not shocking, what is are all the people on reddit defending it as being something else. I’m so disappointed that in 2024, people still have no idea the programming and agenda right in front of them. It’s not funny, it’s not a joke, these sickos rape children. Here is a movie all about it…
milo
April 20, 2024 at 9:42 pm
the sad truth. How long until thus shi* gets tore down by good men?
Justin
March 12, 2024 at 6:08 pm
I got 20 minutes into the film before looking up reviews wondering if it was going to ever get good and 30 minutes before ending the trash.
James Carrick
March 12, 2024 at 6:15 pm
Happy to help.
Sasha
March 16, 2024 at 2:13 am
I didn’t even make it 20 minutes in. Absolute garbage. I Couldn’t force myself to watch more. I don’t understand all the glowing reviews. This world has gone crazy.
La
March 17, 2024 at 1:24 am
I forced myself to finish this film. I find it hard to believe that Emma won an Oscar for her performance, were the other nominees that bad? Bit of advice for actors who want a statue for their mantle, play someone with mental deficiencies or get totally naked and have rough sex (aka Tom Hanks and Halle Barry). Another Hollywood is just too sophisticated for us regular folk.
Ann
March 17, 2024 at 11:56 am
The only thing I like about this movie is your review of it. I’m glad to know that others realize this movie is disgusting and glorifies child molestation. Only a predator would think that the child was enjoying it the whole time. I like dark comedy – American Psycho is a brilliantly complex and funny film. This one is just glorified ickiness. My heart breaks for every child who was put through abuse and I’m ashamed of our world for awarding others who pretend this is art.
Simone
March 17, 2024 at 6:15 pm
When I found out what was going on this movie, I was completely horrified and utterly disgusted. The mind and soul inside of this adult shell is a CHILD. A CHILD. The movie follows the ever evolving sexual exploitation of a child. How did this end up being green lit? And who in their right mind would vote for it to receive so many accolades?? So wrong.
Barbara
March 22, 2024 at 5:23 pm
This is deffinitely a woke movie, it promotes:
-Lesbianism
-Feminism misinterpreted as sexual liberty
-Socialism
-Bonus: Pedophilia
This is sick
Maria Park
March 23, 2024 at 2:54 am
I agree. Hollywood loves and promotes filth AND pedophilia. How is this allowed?? Jeez.
rob
March 30, 2024 at 8:41 pm
LOL I’m not alone! I was watching this movie and Tropic Thunder kept popping into my head, along with the line never go full retard. Finished it thoroughly disappointed, and very confused as to how movie critics were hailing it as a masterpiece, so I decided to watch Tropic Thunder as a sort of palette cleanser. I have never laughed so hard in my life, nearly gave myself an asthma attack laughing, after the discordant mess of Poor Things the humor in Tropic Thunder was on a whole different level. Poor Things is like one of those joke movies from the intro lol… I sort of feel like Poor Things is to crazy white women what Tropic Thunder is to the average bloke.
River
March 31, 2024 at 12:16 am
OMG! Tropic Thunder is the best comedy movie ever! I let a few years go between rewatching so it’s new again to me. I just watched it Friday. And yes! Woke AF flavor of the year Emma’ Stone went full retard and the apple scene is her career ender. Yes, all the sick woke Hollywierd narcissists fawn all over her, but they’re not the ones that matter box office wise. Emma is the new Jennifer Lawrence that was the it girl 6 years or more ago. What has she done in the last 2 years? Nothing of note. Her career is toast as will Emma Stones be.